perseverance,determination and devotion~to achieve your goal

life
is just like climbing a high hill
everyone hope to reach the summit
to have the best view of panoramic

nevertheless
the slope will not be forever promenade agreeable
somehow
it becomes so steep
that you feel hard to proceed
（when encumbrance comes to your way）
then you stop, and you fail

only the one with determination, devotion and perseverance
will reach the summit
only they who have the right atitude
will finally stand at the peak
looking down
the mysterious of the verdure
looking up
and saw the golden hue of the sunset

are they really deaf?

people are said to be deaf
not because they can't hear what you said
the best admonition was given to them
but they didn't take it to heart

they heard it
and then forget about it

the others
they heard it
but the evil and greed thought consumed their conscience
perhaps
attachment to luxurious?affluent?indulgent?
or may be
hedonism?narcissism?disorientation?

they never realise the thought of evil and greed is the root of defilement
and they followed blindly
they lost their way
they forget your admonition

and we said
they are deaf

ask,seek and open the door of knowledge

the one who has wisdom know how to ask, seek and open the door of knowledge
he will seek for the solace and satisfaction in spirituality
instead of ephemeral paper of qualification, statues or wealth

he will start ponder about something greater than himself
and this can open the door to numerous doors to discover the true meaning of life
delve into the realm of spirituality
then you will have better comprehend on religious teaching and statue

everything happens for a reason ,and everyone crosses your path for a reason

look for the silver lining
whenever a cloud appears in the blue
remember somewhere the sun is shining
and so the right thing to do
is make it shine for you

a heart full of frolic and fun and gladness
will always banish sadness and strife
so
always look for the silver lining
and try to find the sunny side of life

~never hesitate when you want to praise someone~

~i am lavish in my praise and hearty in my approbation~

friends~don't worry, I am still alive!

long time didn't update this blog already
at first, decided to delete it
because i am so lazy to update it sometimes~
but now feel like continue to write
because my friends miss me too much
until she check up for my blog updating (but obviously i do disappoint you by without any current updating) fb message me,phone msg and call me!
just want to know my current situation

so, i know i have to write something to ensure you know that your friend is still ALIVE!
but really not much to write about
because this holidays i am really undergo metamorphosis
for half a month already
wondering since when i became such a good girl
can stay at home for so long!
i am surprising too~haha~

like a snake perhaps?
need to mould
for certain period
haha~
i am not kidding~
really moulding
ever heard snake can go outing when it is moulding?
definitely not right?
because it will affect my growing progress~

so,
well, i suppose i missed out a lot of gathering with my friends
here~i am apologising to all~
*sowey*
but really thanks for all the invitation~
haha

hey~friends~calm you down already?
will update with you all my current situation later(when i am not that lazy anymore~haha~holidays what~!)
and really touch by your sweet call~

inner feeling

being trapped at home
same as involved urself in a fiery carnage
how much you want to leave but yet
u hav to perservere
still trying to find a way out?
let juz calm ur heart
tame ur wild heart
peace in mind
anyway
it is such a beautiful morning
yeapi
what a great day!

passer by?

people come into ur life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.

When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person.
When someone is in your life for a reason, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritualty.
They may seem like a godsend and they are.
They are there for a reason you need them to be.
Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvinient time,
this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.
Sometimes they die, sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realise is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done.
The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a season, because your turn has come to share, grow and learn.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Believe it, it is real.But for a reason.

Lifetime relationships teach you lifetime lessons,
things that you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.
Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.
It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant~

fly lightly, embrace simplicity

When you realise calamites roamed all over the country
when you realise earthquake in turky just killed many people
and there are only a few survivors who cried for their loved one
when you realise so many people just lot their home in the inundated that happened few days ago
when everything around you seemed to be changed
everyone seemed to facing certain obstacles tht cant be solved
will you still waiting for someone to reach out to u?
or will you lend a helping hand to others before they do so?
you are born with prosperity, others are born with poverty
but they learn how to be stronger
how to make their lives meaningful
rather than mourn about the hapless condition that they have to bear with
they are grateful~
are u?
will u ?
i have enough, i always happy
embrace simplicity, travel light in the sky
be a kite~

you r an angel

i have a very good friend of mine
she is so pure
but rational enough
she teaches me how to be a selfless person
she puts others as priority all the times
she is so affable and approachable
you feel comfortable to spend time with her
no stress
no hard feeling
she teach you everything she knows
she equips you with all the skills you need in life
she never let you suffer alone
instead she is willing to sacrifice all she has to make you joyful
she knows when you need a friend to talk to
she never force you to do anything you don't like
she is the best friend i can ever have
n i will do the same to her
as she is such a precious gift to me
n i can hardly meet someone like her anymore
so selfless
so pure
so naive~
gabby~ she is really an angel to me~

Visit to Old Folk's Home

     This wasn’t the first time I went to old folk’s Home but this time I underwent different experience ,mainly because i don't know why but i just felt that  people here were not as cheerful as the  elderly i went to visit last time.I felt that they were not happy with their life here.They don’t really make friends with each other but they suffered in their own world.Most of them are facing the same problem,they have not much trust on others.In another word, they don't open their heart and let others go into their life,because thay are afraid to love people.One the way back, i heard senior discussing something about IF OU ARE OPENING YOU HEART TO LOVE SOMEONE, YOU ARE OPENING YOUR HEART FOR SOMEONE TO HURT YOU TOO .And it explains somthing.......so try not blaming someone when they are acting so that you think they are arrogant, just that they have a protection in their heart to get rid of everything that might injure them.....try to embrace them with love......

....The first lady I was trying to communicate with,erm….seem like not really enjoying my accompany(sad to say but yeah, it is truth that i failed to walk into her life).Since she did the surgery on the cornea,she became blind as she has diabetes.After talking to her, I understand that she is so depressed that she can’t feel any hope in her life.I don’t really know how to console her but she seems like trying to get rid of me,kinda sad.There are also talkative and cheerful one and I felt sorry somehow because you know I really can’t help much.So, thousands of question popped out of my head.Should I just go there ,sing with them,have fun with them,let them feel happy even for a day?(but I don’t really know did I do that or in another way)?This way seem to be irresponsible though.or should I go there and listen to them,understand their problem and encourage them?But still I don’t really know what can I do for them.So,conclusion s that I don’t really know what I can do for them but come to see the one around you.Do u think it will be possible the same thing just happen to your parents?the one you love?the one you even swear to that you will protect them and accompant them forever?So, try to understand them, what they actually want from you, sme may just want you to be happy and able to be independent.Then you can have your own life  and they will be grateful too as you are fine.But some will like your accompany,your love to the.So, try not to disappoint them.I know every people got different perception.So, the best way is to have good communication with everyone but not just your parents, understand their needs and give your love to them as love can give you power and strength.No one will get sad and ignorant to u for no reason.They choose to keep their mouth shut,they choose to express everything in an opposite way,they said they don’t care about whatever so happens anymore ,but THEY DO….JUST THAT WE FORGET TO USE OUR HEART TO LISTEN THEIR WORDS……

Feeling after visit to Crisis Home

        After a visit to the Crisis Home, I get to know more about the knowledge of HIV  or AIDS and I suppose everyone do.It is a truth that people tend to keep a distance from people who are HIV positive just because we don’t have sufficient knowledge on HIV/AIDS. And yeah, they should be afraid of us rather than we afraid of them as their immune system are weaker.And it was surprisingly that they are so enthusiasm and wow, we had fun together.It was quite unbelievable when you refresh back that you just had a wonderful night with them and realize that hey, they are just normal human being as us.Why abandoned them?and why push them away from us when they NEED us.So, the only thing we can do now is to spread the knowledge  to as many people as possible so that there won’t be a boundary that keeps each other apart just because we don’t KNOW, we don,t ASK and end up as we don’t CARE .They are human being like everyone of us living here.While we still have the abilities, why don’t we us do something to them.Not really a big one but a small act to show our concern will do the best.Treat them as your family, love them, show our caring to them, visit them more frequently so that they won’t feel lonely, and lastly the most important things, tell the society more information about HIV and AIDS.Let everyone know that someone is waiting there to be embrace and accepted to be part of their family……..no discrimination ,no stigma….just love….they are part of us and we live as one…….

treat today as a gift!

the future is mystery and
the past is history
but today is a gift.

That is how we call it

so no fear for your future
and no regret for your past
so it wont destroy your joy,fun and frolic for present~

you don't have to be a perfectionist! but you have to know who you are by asking yourself more

we learn how to cool growing question
evolve around our career
academics
and personality
as the years gone

and we learn about
we arent the creme de la creme
in all aspect
when we get to acknowlegde more people~

you aren't doing nothing when you think, but you are growing up mentally

~don't underestimate the value of doing nothing or just go along with,
listening to thing that u can't hear or not bothering with~

don't be despondent by what you have to do now

~the best way to appreciate your job is to imagine urself without one~

appreciate what you have

~We come to forget
 happiness
 doesn't come by getting something we dont have
 but rather recognizing and apprecating what we have~

the book records every single details that teach me how to be stronger and build up who i am today

how to adopt your dream?
how to procure to success?
i want to transcribe a book about everything that happens in my life
~a book in my mind
~a book for me myself to read through
~juz me~

how to live my life?

how wide is the spectrum of life?
i am tired of acting professionally while i m not!
can i be myself again?
will i be downgrade or belittle
when i act so naively?allow me,pls

a perfect life? is it possible?

can anyone give me a disseminate guideline on how to live a perfect life?
i am lost in the jungle!

stress

best way to allay your stress?
For me
travelling!
yeah,my favourite terms are explore,dream and discover.
Give me some time and money and i will automatic disappear myself.
Credit that?
i love nature vehemently.
Always can't wait to know more bout the world.
As long as i feel free and happy.I can even use up all my monet in one go.
Lame me!

Forgiveness

Realistic is unbearable.
When you realise your friends betray you,when you realise he never true to you
when you realise what he told you was full of lie
You despondent,you hesitate what is the truth of friendship.
Still, you blessed him all the best.
Because you know that somehow anyway,he brought you fun.

Treat him as always because you have a good heart.
You never fail to hold your principle
Treat all just the same.
He will realise one day how wrong he was.

You have a generous heart.
Accept his apology.
Have faith in yourself.
No one can hurt you if you do no wrong.
Protective shell is unnecessary.
Dare to explore,dream and discover.
Life full of challenge.
And remember be determined and strong
Life and obstacle teaches you to grow up into a mature person.
Know how to be tham master of butterfly in your stomach
No fear.
No worries.

your life will only begin when you know how to live it!

~dont afraid
that the life will end
be afraid
that it never begin~

never regret on what you have done! be regret if you never do so~

~Twenty years from now
you will be disappointed on what u didn't do than by the one you do
So, throw off  the bowlines
Stay away fromt he safe harbour
Catch the winds trade in your sail
Explore
dream
and discover~

be grateful to all around u~

~Let us be grateful to people who make us smile
 they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom~

i am happy!~as good as always~

~whoever happy will make others happy too~

smile to everyone around you

~A smile is a passport that will take you anywhere~

pendedahan kerjaya sebagai seorang doktor(last episode)

pendedahan kerjaya sebagai seorang doktor(last episode)

    Last day and indeed a very short session.Obstetrics and Gynecology unit was the last destination we were headed for.It was quite disappointed that we didn't get any chance to watch the delivery process.We only given an a short time to have a peep at the wad where the pregnant women stayed before and after they gave birth to a new-born-baby(the gift to us).They all seemed so delighted.There were also patients who undergo miscarrige(perhaps caused by the hormone progesterone to mantain pregnancy is blocked,the foetus grows outside the vagina,automobile accident or even due to toxic substances).That were the case which we called as the gift given was taken back for the reluctance of our God to give out the baby(beause they are too cute).
                      Well, most of the times, we were stayed in the spacy room where the penyelia discussed with us the reason and reality as a doctor,exposed us to his own experience during the housementship, the obstacles we might meet in the future.


Generally, let me summarise it as i find it useful sometimes
reality as a doctor

1. we are not saying that you can't make money as a doctor(what we were told all the times recently) but i think we should say it in another more appropriate way.It is not a career to make money but never mean that you can't make money as a doctor.There are 5 main fields in medicine where you can earn a lot(orthopedik, themology,)
2.We have to sacrifce a lot of time.As we were told earlier.For instance, do some research though, (perhaps a questionaire)There are two kind of woman in this hospital
-27 sth~getting married and eith children
-40sth.~nunsery~not getting married
In another word ,soe of them get married while they are still studying or else once you start work as a doctor.Your time are used up just by that(scary but reality)
still many more but lazy to say so~~
3.Ready to do the same work every single day.


Experience during housemenship
1.recommended for those who can't deal with stress.As we know it happens all the time. There is a special department there ,mostly for the housemen.Reason is protruded.When patients feel insatisfied, they complain and blame it on doctor.When doctor get stress, they scolded housemen and even teased them in front of everyone.Can you fight back ?definiitely not.This will end up with every doctor knowing it and you will be INFAMOUS for being so inpolite.So, the best solution, swallow all disatisfation back and smile back,facig another day like that. If you can't do it.Now you can say farewell to this career.

2.Secondly, never treat the patient as number, it will be so rude to do so.Like"bed 101 is under stable condition",arent they human being?Love the patient and try hard to remember their name.They will appreciate you when you talk to them.
3. Thirdly, be shine outand stand out.Because how many can be chosen for specialise while there are around 60 housemen there.Do you expect them to remember every single of your faces ornames?
4. So, the solution given was before you start anything, mae sure you have a very good reason for choosing ths carreer. Hold it till th end of your life.Never let the fire inside you blow off or you will never feel any happier in your life.

So, i come out with a conclusion finally

 No matter what kind of career you are in, there are obstacles. But i believe it can be changed with a pasitive mind.And problem can be solved.As long as you have a pure heart to help the other, doctor will always be a good option.Just be who you are. As long as you don't push yourself too hard, it wouldn't be a big problem.

pendedahan kerjaya sebagai seorang doktor (part 3)

pendedahan kerjaya sebagai seorang doktor (part 3)

                      Once you reach unit latihan, walk straight and pass by a garden on your right,turned into the path and walk sraight till you see the venopuncture unit on your right.The endoscope unit is just next to it.We were given a chance to witness the process to examine the internal organ using a tiny scope.There are two type of endoscopy,through the stomach or anus.The previous group told me that they got the opportuniy to see both.One man was suspected having cancer because he was having diarrhoae for the past few days.Thus, endoscopy from anus was applied to him. For us, we only got  to see endoscopy from mouth. First, the housemen spray the liquid into the mouth(to expand the tract all the way from oesophagus to stomach).Then, she asked whether enough or not(she only spray twice on the surface of tongue). The doctor ordered her to spray more and deeper inside.The snake(i mean the tube)started to slithered into the oesphagus and what saw by the snake was shown on the screen.We noticed that the muscles on the wall kept on contracting and relaxing.There were a lot of yellow liquid there(assume it as lipids).The snake kept on hissing to release the liquid that expand the path in order to ease the movement.Then, the snake started to action. It opened it mouth and bite the walls of stomach (just to take some sample to do experiment).It just bite and pulled, so the blood spit out instantly(is a lot on screen but a little in reality.)Ouuch, so painful, but the doctor said the woman won't feel anything as it was just a small bite actually.The doctor also exclaimed that it will heal itself in one or two days.So, we had to keep on reminding ourselves that just the matter that the images were expanded on screen. After about 6 bites, the snake felt satisfied and began to slithered out.Well, not offended but it was physiological phenomena,when the stomach expanded, there must be a lot of wind inside,so long fart was normal in this case.(fFYI,Conversely, if not fart or fart excessive foul, is an abnormal phenomenon.)Other than that, she gave out sound like"errr~errr~"and we started to wonder if she felt pain but it was axplained as hiccups to release gas in stomach too. Then, the blood was taken to experiment room. A certain liquid was added and the yellow liquid changed into a pink one.According to the doctor, the faster the changing of the colour, the more serious the internal organ was infected by bacteria.

                                This was the lower session for yesterday exposure.So just a short one.

Pendedahan kerjaya sebagai seorang doktor(part 2)

Pendedahan kerjaya sebagai seorang doktor(part 2)

               FYI,two main units we went today were the SOPD(Surgical Out Patient Department) unit and emergency unit. Before we started, i got to know a little bit information from my friend yesterday about what happened when they stepped into the red zone where critical case happened.She told me that the moment they entered, sad to say, the electrocardiogram stopped beeping~what i mean here was the patient just passed away. So, there only got a chance to give a last glance before the white cloth was being pulled up.Well, so it was a beautiful morning and i got to listen my friend's personal experience on that yesterday.Yeah, indeed, cope with death is one of the significant lesson to learn before you start to pursue your dream as a doctor.



               After everyone in our group was gathered outside the latihan unit(one late for certain reason i supposed),we headed for emergency unit,expected something~~~Well ,as always,we got a rough briefing before we entered. There are 3 zone, green, yellow and red(same as traffic light).The difference is that green zone mean for someone who still have the ability to walk in, yellow zone mean for someone who stilll can go in with wheelchair, red zone,i suppose you can guess so(for someone who can't even sit anymore ,but have to mount in with stretcher and remain unconscious).In the yellow zone, the only case that attracted me was the 27-year-old woman(i think so ) who tied up to the bed.She couldn't move either her hands or legs. At first, i felt pity for her and wondered why. Then, she suddenly jumped up(but couldn't for sure)and asked "sister, can you help me to teach maths?~erm ,as i know that is not ordinary one but abacus" and then lied back. We stunned at the moment and her sister just answered"aye~ aye". After a second, she repeated the same movement. Till here, i suppose you can guess the disease.

~schizophrenia~the symptoms she was having at the moment was hallucination.

                We entered the red zone with calm and came out with solemn expression. When we entered there, i immediately saw a familiar face(don't scared by my sentence, i mean the familiar face was a doctor, not a patient,he was the doctor in Clinic Chin~Doctor Lawrence~everyone who live Blossom should know). There was a patient on the bed and 10 doctor surrounded him.FYI, i think more than half of them were under housemen-ship because they looked so young! We were NOT allowed to see much thing because they pulled the curtain once we entered which hindered our vision(in purpose). There was a commotion later on. One of the lady suddenly cried out loudly . Obviously ,she was the man's family. Perhaps he was really under critical condition and immediately we were kind of being chase out. The lady lost control.She cried out so loud and shouted.It was kind of weird feeling that came out from me. Although i don't know this lady at all and the condition was just like something you watch in drama. Someone's beloved just under critical condition and may be leaving her  any moment.At the instance. the lady solemn eyes seemed to locked onto yours.It was just like passing a message to you. You felt grief and unbearable.For a moment, you stood there stunningly. Not knowing what you can do. The ambulance just keep on carrying patient in and out. There were so many people waiting to be cured and there was not even enough time for you to refresh what had happened just now and and that moment you will just accepted death as part and parcel of life.

                     I think i can only complete the upper session for today trip.Too late at the moment i i need to sleep earlier for tomorrow trip so will be continue(~surgery part~)

Pendedahan Kerjaya Seorang Doktor(first day trip)

Pendedahan Kerjaya Seorang Doktor(first day trip)

          It just start like any normal morning.After having my hearty meal,i headed for Hospital Tuanku Jaafar Seremban. I reached there at 8.00 sharp and i was the third earliest who reached there. I met some of my old peers included my secondary school friends, friends i met during TNB camp and also JPA interview. Then, we headed for a special room where we needed to do our registration. We made a long queue and every single of us got a file with the schedule we will go through in  these 3-day-journey in the hospital. Beside, we were divided into 5 groups with 6 people in a group.We "embarked" our journey by visiting 5 main units that we will be going these few days. However, we can't make it to visit all the unit as there are 18 units in total and it is "impossible "mission to do so.After we "roughly" get to know the location of all these units. We had our morning tea.Well, not for me because i already had "nasi lemak "for my breakfast. So, i just sat there and chit-chatting.

          After that, we went to the first unit which was the orthopedik unit.First, our penyelia just Gave us a rough briefing on what it was all about. Yeah, i get to know that that this unit specialize in all bones but not skull and thoracic cavity.Then, we had a peek on the patients in boy wad.There were 2 serious case there.

First case~A27-year-old man got severe injure on his right leg.He has HIV(Human Immunodeficiency Virus),deciphering its interaction with immune system.There was an apparatus on his injured leg to hold his bone in space so that it would not relocate.He mourned in pain.He showed us that he was so suffering and yet he needed to sustain his life!

Second case~An old man got attached by someone and ended up with "hanging" hand,in proper word. His wrist was cut and we can see the bone since there were no more flesh on one part. The nurse was doing some cleaning like removing the bandaging and washing the wound so that his wrist will not get infected by virus. But ,i felt the pain.i don't knoe why.Well, i just need to keep on remind myself!That ain't my hand~it was unbearable though. One of the girl in my group got a bit faint~ing .But not because of scare But maybe the place was too hot and full of "weird" smell, and perhaps she forgot to eat her breakfast though.After that, we had another indeed long break, FROM 12.30 TO 2.30~we got a lot of time to walk around once we had our lunch.

                  Well, then we proceeded to the second unit~guess what~forensic unit.What you expect then?Nothing, but just corpse. The place was a little bit creepy.We got a chance to look at the real dissection on a dead body. Once all the doctor entered the room with a corpse waiting to be dissect (in order to find the reason of death).We gathered around(just outside the room).And the body was covered in white clothes and they remove it.Well, just emphasis the private part was covered(kind of respect).And in a professional way,They started the dissection with a "Y"shape on his neck and then all the way to the stomach and belly. Erm, i don't think i need to explain in detail.Because it was a little bit________~just let it blank and proceed.All the organs were took out using something like "chopsticks" and "slice"(to check anything inside or not).Then, they used the scoop we normally use to take the soup to take out all the blood and put it all into pail(a pail of blood~some dripped onto the floor)~i really don't feel like explaining it in detail. Let me just ended it. Erm~they sew it back and put back all the organ~well~as well as the brain(since the brain was cut into piece, they used their cap~made of plastic to carry it)and put it all together  into the stomach and sew it back.Just end like that,because i wont want to make anyone vomit or lost appetite~

                      That is all for today and i will continue my second note after tomorrow visit~